My new year of the rat feels like this work. This work was highly inspired by Wong Kar wai's "in mood for love." I really love the sound track of Shigeru Umebayashi which traces the foot steps of each individual that crosses path and remains in their own path. The solitude of life and the glimpse of meeting, strong connection and never another word exchanged. Because they never could speak to each other again, the stories continues, if the wise existence of togetherness happens, the story is transformed into another one. Perhaps the silence is what made the story, the two people knew how strong their ties were but never were able to come together and when chance came, one broke away and till another person's last breath, and even after, one longs and miss the other person inside them. It feels like a such a special relationship, but most relationships that had any real connection is like that. It is a common story that many people can relate to. That is why the beauty of the heaviness,sensuality and shyness can be recognized by the audience. Somewhere the relationship without it happening, it happened, it feels like if we were seeing the ghost, mirage of the highest form of platonic love. Gasho to you, my friend. You are with me as you never left even we broke off as it was too much too little and not realistic. When you told me you are not feeling well, and getting another surgery, I should have dropped everything to be there, I said I will come soon and I arrived after you left. You are gone but still here, telling me that I should shut my aperture and read the light till I was making your photograph.Your photograph are tender, full of love and life of the people. I was so much more harder, closer, intense and strange. You encouraged and helped me as if I was you and I told you I hated your photographs because I was angry. Most time you found me strange and superimposed upon your own strangeness,. I just bought a book you published because I want to touch your words, your photograph, a paragraph that you wrote about me to recognize that our relationship existed. Thank you for being you, the odd hardheaded, funny and talkative person. You taught me how to pick fruits from trees, checked my clothes while it was drying, commenting on my favorite brand at the time and embarrassing me. You showed me funny TV series, cooked me dinner while you were wishing me to cook the dinner. I promised myself I will watch out to never ever have this kind of friendship. And I confessed to another photographer how I am careful not to pass the line and he laughed and said that he knows exactly what I am saying. You see this is a complete banality in life. But you were not a banality to me, you have been in my soul since the first time we met. Rest in peace. I will be gentle and kinder to you inside me.
All the blah blah with some process and try outs that is part of my creative process, and life as an artist.