Mirrors of souls

In the coldest day in February 2012,  I met for the first time the person I love the most in my life. The person, I love the most is evidently dividing my heart with another person I met in May 2004. That is the major part of my life. yet there are many people who I love and glad I met and parted or remain together. February is an important month for me because I lost a friend that I regret and miss. I lost my mother who brought me to life and I knew that the time has come. I sometimes wonder why, I met and meet people I care deeply for. I wonder if this is other people's reality. When I breath in air looking into the bleu dark night sky, I wonder what may happened to the man who used to dragged his stuff on the ground that I absolutely thought of when I made my large Christmas production of cookies and orange peal. He was in my mind and I wanted to bring him the package. But I stopped myself. I said I do not want him to think that I am doing charity as it is Christmas. My intention was not charity but because I liked him and cared about him. I know where he sleeps and how he dragged a wooden structure so his mattress did not touch the ground. He slept in front of library in high structured bed with many layers of duvet. He did not speak to anyone and when I crossed him few times, he was shouting out of anger towards the people who was walking by. I would go to the bakery to get some bread in 6:30 am and if he was around, I bought a croassant  for him.The first 6 months he never addressed me a word. Just nodded to say thank you or smiled. I did the same. I never spoke to him except saying this is for you. He was the first homeless person I knew who was reading and taking notes. I liked him very much without knowing him. There are some people who lived on the street that left me an impression or kindness or knowledge. But he was kind of special for me. I would get myself sample of free tea tasting and bring him another one. sometimes he had many cups already and said to me that he already had some. There are many homeless people in my neighbourhood. There are some I know and they know me for years and had no relationship. I never went to them and they never came to me. One day, the man who courageously dragged his stuff talked to me about " Elegance". I did not get what he said and asked him to repeat but he never repeated. Just before I left for the summer holidays, I saw the man again. He was sitting near place de la république between the perfume shop and bakery. I was leaving to over seas the next day. I never gave him any money as I preferred that I treated him like a friend. this time for some reason, I opened my wallet and gave him all the change. I think this was a strange scene for him. Usually people give one thing or maximum few coins. I gave him all.  That is when he said he would like to invite me for a coffee sometime.  This made me happy. In fact very happy. and it stills makes me happy when I think of him. He was no longer living in my neighbourhood when I came back. I still think of him when I walk in the neighbourhood. I am often imagining that  he is no longer on the street.  I am wishing that he now is living somewhere far from here. Drinking a cup of coffee and enjoying taking notes of what he is reading.